What My Heart Breaks For.

I was reading more of the book Red Letters this morning on the lightrail.  Oh my.  It touched the deepest parts of my heart.  It took everything I had to not bust out into tears right then.  I did not want the people on the lightrail with me to think I was completely insane.
So with this book, I am still not a fan-- weird huh. It is like Davis is wanting everyone's passion to be the AIDS/HIV orphans in Africa, but that is simply not the case for everyone, me included. God gave everyone different passions and it really annoys me that Davis wants everyone to help with the pandemic in Africa.  If we all helped, we could make a difference, but God calls us to different things and places on the planet.
Anyway, what touched my heart this time was a story Davis shared.  He was proving the point that ordinary people, like you and me, can make a difference.  the story was about some American teenagers serving in an orphanage in India. There are 370 orphans that live off of 7 cents a day. They all have scabies. They all have lice. They share beds with no mattresses. They have no soap so they eat with dirty hands. They have no water in the heat of the summer. They huddle together in the winter to stay warm. Can you imagine this? I surely can't.
The American teenagers said that what mattered more to the kids than food or cleanliness or warmth was that the Americans would remember them. Wow.
This is when the tears wanted to come.
All the American teenagers have to do is remember those kid's names for them to make a difference. Such an easy task. Yeah they can and will do more, but the smallest thing makes a difference in a little orphan's life.
After I stopped reading, the passion for orphans came spurring out of my heart. My heart breaks for each one of them. It pains me so much to know I am so blessed with a family, a house, money, food, and many other amenities--when they have none of it.
But to know I can make a difference in their lives brings me so much joy.. peace... and hope. I can do that. I can change a life. I only have to be willing to serve where and how God wants me to.

To Make A Difference

I am reading this book called Red Letters by Tom Davis, and though I am not a fan of the book as a whole, there was this was section that really spoke to me.  Tom Davis is a big advocate for HIV/AIDS over in Africa. In one of his chapters, he talked about taking care of others and having the compassion in our hearts like Jesus did while He was on earth. Here is what Davis wrote that really spoke to me:
"Every time I go into a community to offer help, I take with me little more than a sincere desire to do whatever is needed. I go with the expectation that I will leave a little of my money, my time-- a little of myself --with people who need it more than I do.  I don't do this to get anything in return-- I do it because it delights God.  But here's the crazy truth: Every time I leave that kind of environment, I walk away with far more than I gave.  I walk away with the smiles I saw in people's eyes, with the echoing laughter from the mouths of children.  I walk away changed."
After I read this, I paused... and said wow... this is exactly how I feel.  Though I have not had the same experiences as Davis, I know exactly where he is coming from.  I think that is why I am so passionate for missions and want to continue doing them.  Seeing the hope in a woman's eyes-- after she was just beat by her husband and sacred for her life--when she heard the truth and love of God, seeing the smiles of the children while playing games and singing songs, seeing the thankful prayers of those who have so little, but yet are so grateful.
Jesus himself said it is better to give than it is to receive.  I have been so blessed in my life.  Though I have been through tough times, God has still been there for me through everything.  I am so blessed to know the truth of God and his unconditional love. All I want in my life is to share Him. To share of his saving grace, to share of His love, to share of His power and might.  Nothing gives me more joy than to share God with others.  I love giving my time and my energy to serve others who need it so much more than me.  I am so thankful that God has put this passion in my heart and that I have the capabilities to continue to go on trips to serve His people.

New Beginnings...

Every time I start something new in my life, I think of it as a new beginning. Today was the beginning of the Fall 2010 semester. Two more of these and then I am done with general education!!  Yes this is how I am thinking of my education right now.  Walking on campus today, I felt very confident.  Confident in who I am. Confident in what I am doing. Confident in where my life is going.  I am usually a very insecure person. I always have been. Very shy. Very reserved. Very introverted.
Today felt different. Though I did not act any different way than I have the past four semesters on this campus; I felt like it was a different atmosphere for me. I felt very positive about it all. Something that I can say is very comforting.  Though I am ready for the semester to be finished (and I just started today), I know that God has some great things planned for me. I just have to be ready and willing to go where He leads and to do what He asks.
There are many paths I can take in life.  A number of different roads I could take at any time. And on any of those roads, God will use me.  God will take my life and use me to glorify Him in all that I do.  This makes me ecstatic.  To be able to serve, to worship, to love the God of the universe. It blows my mind.
And whether I am in Denver, Colorado or Garden Valley, Texas or even Pacasmayo, Peru, I know that God is going to use me as long as I am a willing and open vessel to His calling for my life.